When the RSVP card for David and Emily’s wedding told all women to
“PLEASE WEAR WHITE — WEDDING DRESSES WELCOME,”
my wife Linda and I were baffled.
Everyone knows you don’t wear white to someone else’s wedding.
A quick call to David revealed the truth — Emily’s mother,
Dorothy, was planning to wear her own wedding gown to steal the spotlight.
Emily’s solution? Invite every woman to wear white so Dorothy wouldn’t stand out.
The plan spread fast. On the big day, the chapel was packed with women in gowns,
veils, and lace — even elbow gloves. At 2:47 p.m., Dorothy arrived,
sparkling in rhinestones and a cathedral train, ready for her grand entrance… until she saw a room full of brides.
She sputtered, “What is WRONG with all of you?!”
Alan, her husband, innocently replied,
“But you’re wearing white too, honey.” Dorothy froze — outplayed.
Then the music swelled, and Emily entered wearing a breathtaking red-and-gold gown,
radiant and untouchable.
Dorothy sat in silence through the vows, her dress now lost in a sea of white.
Before the cake was cut, she slipped out without a word.
The rest of us danced, laughed, and toasted Emily’s brilliant move.
Linda raised her glass: “To the bride — who knows when to wear red, and when to raise hell.”
