My neighbor was working in his yard when he was startled by a late model car that came crashing through his hedge and ended up in his front lawn.

He rushed to help an elderly lady driver out of the car and sat her down on a lawn chair.He said with excitement, “You appear quite elderly to be driving.”

“Well, yes, I am,” she replied proudly. “I’ll be 97 next month, and I am now old enough, that I don’t even need a driver’s license anymore.”

He asked “How do you know?”

“The last time I went to my doctor, he examined me and asked if I had a driver’s license. I told him, yes and handed it to him. He took scissors out of the drawer, cut the license into pieces, and threw them in the waste basket, saying, ‘You won’t need this anymore.’ So I thanked him and left!”

=============================================
One day a truck driver was driving down a highway when he looked in his rear view mirror and saw a blonde in a little blue car tailgating him.
Well, this truck driver hated to be tailgated, so he stops his truck and walks over to the car, which had also stopped and said, “Hey, lady, if you don`t stop tailgating me, I`m going to bust up your car.”

So he gets back in truck and drives away.

A little while later he looks in his rearview mirror, and sees the blonde tailgating him again. So he stops his truck, gets out, and walks over to the car, saying, “Hey lady, stop tailgating me, or I`ll bust up your car.”

So he gets back in his truck and drives away.

A little while later he again looks in his rearview mirror, and once again the blonde is tailgating him. So he stops his truck, walks over to the car, and says, “Lady, get out.”

So the blonde steps out of her car, and the truck driver draws a circle on the roadside, saying, “Now don`t step out of that circle.”

Then he proceeds to bust up the blonde`s car. Smashing the windshields and windows. And the blonde starts laughing.

The truck driver rips out the seats, and busts all the tires. And the blonde keeps laughing.

He takes a sledge hammer from his truck, and pounds in the frame, rips out the steering wheel, cuts the brake lines, etc, until the car is completely totaled. And the blonde is still laughing.

The truck driver walks over to the blonde, and says, “Lady, I just completely totaled your car, and you`re still laughing. What is so funny?????”

The blonde replies, giggling, “I stepped out the circle and you didn`t see me!!!!!!!!”