Judge: Why do you want divorce?

Petitioner: My wife asks me to peel off garlic, cut onions, wash utensils.

Judge: What’s the problem in this? Just warm up the Garlic, it will be easy to peel it. Before cutting Onions just chill them in the refrigerator and then while cutting them the eyes won’t burn. Before washing utensils just immerse them in water tub for 10 minutes, they can be easily washed

Before washing clothes in Surf, soak them in water for half an hour , all the stains will go away and even hands won’t get tired.

Petitioner: Understood Your honour Please return my petition.

Judge: What have you understood?

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Petitioner: That your condition is worse than mine

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Young Chuck, moved to Montana and bought a horse from a farmer for $100.00. The farmer agreed to deliver the horse the next day.

The next day he drove up and said, “Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the horse died.”

Chuck replied, “Well, then just give me my money back.”

The farmer said, “Can’t do that. I went and spent it already.”

Chuck said, “Ok, then, just bring me the dead horse.”

The farmer asked, “What ya gonna do with him?”

Chuck said, “I’m going to raffle him off.”

The farmer said, “You can’t raffle off a dead horse!”

Chuck said, “Sure I can. Watch me. I just won’t tell anybody he’s dead.”

A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked, “What happened with that dead horse?”

Chuck said, “I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars a piece and made a net profit of $898.00.”

The farmer said, “Didn’t anyone complain?”

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Chuck said, “Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back.”