In an Anglican church

In an Anglican church, each service begins with a greeting.
The officiating clergyman says, “The Lord be with you.”

The congregation used to respond by saying, “And with thy spirit.”

But, with the modernizing of the liturgy, the minister now says, “The Lord be with you,” and everyone responds with, “And also with you.”

One Sunday a visiting bishop went to a church where the sound system was known to be old and unreliable.

As he approached the microphone, he tapped it several times and finally said, “There’s something wrong with this!”

Without hesitation, the whole congregation answered faithfully, “And also with you.”

One recent Sunday, a young boy arrived to his Sunday school class late.
His teacher knew that the boy was usually very prompt and asked him if anything was wrong. The boy replied no, that he was going to go fishing, but that his dad told him that he needed to go to church instead.

The teacher was very impressed and asked the boy if his father had explained to him why it was more important to go to church rather than to go fishing.

To which the boy replied, “Yes, ma’am, he did. My dad said that he didn’t have enough bait for both of us.”

One day a young teen was in a church for the first time and he got a seat net to a not-so-good-looking woman.
The pastor was preaching and he said: “Tell your neighbour how beautiful they are.”

and the boy stood up and said pastor: “How can you expect me to lie in a church?”

A young boy and his dad went out fishing one fine morning.
After a few quiet hours out in the boat, the boy became curious about the world around him. He looked up at his dad and asked “How do fish breath under water?”

His dad thought about it for a moment, then replied, “I really don’t know, son.”

The boy sat quietly from another moment, then turned back to his dad and asked, “How does our boat float on the water?”

Once again his dad replied, “Don’t know, son.”

Pondering his thoughts again, a short while later, the boy asks “Why is the sky blue?”

Again, his dad replied. “Don’t know, son.”

The inquisitive boy, worried he was annoying his father, asks this time “Dad, do you mind that I’m asking you all of these questions?”

“Of course not son.” replied his dad, “How else are you ever going to learn anything?”

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